Addicted for 15 years now !

Q. I have been addicted to drugs for fifteen years now on and often struggle to stay clean for long periods....today i relapsed after 3 months and in my thinking i thought maybe its because i failed to make fajr this morning, as for the past three months i have not missed one fard, but also besides this i only stay clean for a few months and then back to my old habits.i feel so low and even am tired of starting all over again. Is there not something I can do to help myself out of this vicious cycle. In the past 3 months a completed reading the Quraan from the start to the end for the first time in my entire life,I was enjoying reading the quraan so much as I could never read arabic before,but the years of isolation brought on by the drugs made me confined to my room where i would listen to the Quraan being recited and today I can read ,no one taught me and Im sure I still make mistakes but i derived so much pleasure from reading.Now i feel so guilty to pick up the Quraan again Im even so shy I dont want to stand in front of Allah in salaah because i promised Allah i would never do drugs again and i have failed in my promise. i just can’t seem to break the cycle of a few months without drugs and then one day spoils it and i start all over again just to have the cycle repeat itself. Please advise and shukran

A.

1.     It is obvious that you are lacking in courage and ‘himmat’ (perseverance) to carry through with your effort to give up the habit altogether.

2.     If you stay clean for a few months from drugs then it means you can permanently stay away from it. Download and read the book “Kicking the Habit” from the same site or give your name and address, I will send you one free.

3.     Where do you live? If in the Durban area then meet me, introduce yourself. I don’t look down upon anyone especially those young persons trying to give up their bad habits.

4.     What you need is not wazifas (incantations) but someone to guide you out of it. There are large number of people who have Alhamdulillah come out of it.

5.     Don’t be ashamed to cry before Allah Ta’ala. Who else can help. Making dua for you.

Maulana Yunus Patel